Monday, March 4, 2013

The magical replication of Love

The concept of geometrical or exponential or perpetual (I am not sure what descriptor to use here right now so just stick with may be worth your reading time when you're finished) love was almost incomprehensible to me as young man.
In 2000 I became a Daddy. In 2004 I was blessed to become a Daddy yet again. My wonder going into the second Daddyhood was how was I going to be able to love two children equally as I had yet to put into words how I had found so much love inside of me for my first child! I knew what love was. I had been showered in it all my life; I was and still am a part of a wonderful loving family. So here it is 2004 and my daughter is on her way to me. I get tearful thinking about my son and what beautiful changes he brought to my life. HOW in the world was I going to produce enough love for TWO children?
Well, she got here and for those of you with children you know GOD places everything exactly where it is supposed to be at exactly the time is needed AND doesn't let you/me/us see until it is time for you/me/us to see it. Geometrical? Exponential? Perpetual? Nah. Just simply GOD breathed. That's how one heart that was at 200% capacity could accommodate another boundless source of joy, pride, and honor. Through GOD all things are possible and nothing is impossible...just don't expect to understand it all. Just trust that His will be done. 
I am excited to see how God blends two families together. He does it all the time. I know, I am honored to be a part of two of them myself! 
My fears are based on my human-ness, the frailness of children's sense of belonging/identity, etc. Falling into God's leadership will require me trusting and following no matter how dark, foreign, and treacherous the journey ahead may appear.
How does a child gain step siblings with taking damage to their perception of their dynamic with their parent? How does the parent lead (love and discipline equally) all of them without making the first children feel set aside and/or the new children feeling like second hand clearance items?
I know the answer is going to be sharing, listening, and praying. As challenging and rewarding and fulfilling my life is it is little wonder how it all has come to be. GOD is here: always has been; always will be. 
The love that exploded in my heart as a Daddy that I spoke of earlier...comes from GOD who IS love. If I can emulate GOD's treatment of me as a newborn Christian then my life as a Daddy should be a beautiful one. All Christians are part of a Blamily (blended + family). We weren't part of the original line up but through LOVE we are accepted into HIS family as though we were always a part of it.